It's Sad Isn't It?
by SomewhereOnlyWeKnow070897
Summary: We can't always get what we want.


** So after seeing this promo where Eli says "As much as you want a happy ending, you can't have it!" I decided to make a one shot. I hope this helps me get out of my writer's block for my other three stories. I don't own Degrassi. Review!**

Nobody's Point Of View-

The curtens close on the bowing cast and crew. Applause erupts through the gym. Everybody is smiling at the success of the play except one darkly dressed boy, Elijah Goldsworthy. He's happy that the play was a success but that didn't hide the fact that he hid behind it to mask his true emotionally distraught self. Now, it was over, he had nothing to occupy himself with to forget. Which meant the pain was as good as new. He noticed his english teacher walking towards him with a huge smile plastered on her face. For her sake and the sake of his parents he put a fake smirk on his face. Once Mrs. Dawes had reached him, she embraced him in a warm hug.

"Congratulations Eli," she chimed.

"Thank you, , I couldn't have done it without you," Eli murmurs softly. He knows that if his voice passes a level of volume, the pain would be evident. Their hug was interrupted by an over excited Fiona.

"Our baby came to life," she cheers. Eli chuckles.

"Yeah it did."

"Are you ready for your speech?" Fiona asks.

"What speech?" Eli asks. They never went over this in rehearsal.

"The closing speech."

"You never told me about a closing speech," Eli says worriedly.

"Well make something up because your on," Fiona says pushing Eli onto the stage.

Eli's Point Of View-

I look at the quiet crowd. They were expecting me to say something but I didn't know what. I looked through the crowd for my parents. I'm sure they'd be some kind of reassurance but instead I find a different motivation. Clare and Jake kissing. _**Okay I give up!**_

"As much as you want a happy ending, you can't have it!" I boom into the microphone. Clare and Jake immediately pull away from each other. Clare looks at me, no emotions evident in her face. I hear a wail from across the gym. Dammit Eli, there are kids in the audience, calm down! I think of the first thing that calms me down...Clare's smiling face. The images that usually come to mind of pictures of our dates but the one that came to mind now was when she had just said bye to Jake. She looked really happy.

"That's because you can't search for happiness, it comes to you. You can't keep it either, it leaves when it wants to. I was in the most succesful, supporting relationship ever with the girl that I love. I cared about her so much that I wanted her all to myself. I didn't let anyone touch her," I say softly, looking Clare in the eye," I realize now that that was the wrong way to approach things. We broke up. I went through the extremes to get her back which was stupid. I thought that if I were to make her current boyfriend look stupid then she would come back to me. Until I realized that no matter who she was with, her feelings about me would never change. I gave her my all and it wasn't good enough. There is nothing I could do about it. I spent so much time blaming her for not wanting me. I even blamed myself for not reaching her standards. Her happiness made me happy and I thought that I was the only one that could make her happy but today I realized that I'm just making her sadder. She's happy without me. Her new boyfriend makes her happy so I'm happy. It hurts, it really does, that I have to give up the best thing that has ever happened to me but her smile is all I need to go on. She helped me get up when I was so far into the ground that no one spared me a second glance but now I have to help her by supporting her relationship. I hope she's happy. I want her to be happy, with me or without. I guess the moral of this speech and my play is that, if you love something, let it go. Trust me, if you think this is a way to get you back than think again. I'm not going to fight a losing battle but I want you to know that I love you and I always will."

The entire gym was teary eyed. After a long moment of silence the gym was filled with the thunderous sound of clapping. All I could focus on was Clare. She was gaping and looking at me in shock. I looked at her, a sad smirk creeping onto my face, then turned around and walked away. Once I was behind the curtens I saw everyone in the cast and crew looking at me in silence.

"What?" I asked. They just stared at me. Finally Fiona spoke.

"That was beautiful," she said through tears. Soon everyone started to cry.

"Woah guys, why are you crying?" I ask incredulously.

"Eli you don't understand, the majority of us are Eclare fans."

"You like dream filled pastries?"

"No, Eclare as in Eli and Clare. You guys were such a cute couple," a random crew member said.

"Guys, she has a boyfriend," I try to reason with the crying group.

"We thought it was a minor set back," Fiona says.

"Wow, well it isn't but don't worry, I'm at peace," I say honestly. I walk up to who was the only one who wasn't crying besides Imogen.

"Is there any way that I can get out of here without being stopped?" I ask.

"Yes, go out the back door."

I walk out the back door and as promised. No one stopped me. Once I was outside I sank against the schools brick walls. This part of the school was near the woods so I was secluded by trees. I decided to stay here until everyone was gone. I picked up a rock and chucked it against a tree, repeating the process with another rock. I thought that once my relationship with Clare was officially over I would cry but I wasn't. Sure, it hurt like a mother fucker but it was good to know that I was free. However, even though I was free, I knew I couldn't pursue any other girl. My heart still completely belonged to Clare. The only thing that was keeping us apart was that I didn't own hers.

"Hey," a masculine voice says tentatively from beside me. I look up and sigh.

"What do you want Jake?"

"I want to thank you. You probably don't want to hear this but I really do care for her and I am extremely grateful that she has someone who wants to see her happy as much as I do," Jake says.

"Is that it?"

"I just wanted to let you know that if you need anything feel free to ask me."

"I just want one thing."

"Yeah, sure man, what is it?" Jake asks.

"Make her happy," I say.

"I promise," Jake says, patting me on the back and leaving. I guess this is how it was in the real world. As much as you want something, it doesn't happen. It's sad isn't it?


End file.
